


Do Not Weep

by enduringreality



Category: Big Hero 6 (2014), big hero
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Past Character Death, Tadashi is already dead sorry, nothing too graphic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-27
Updated: 2018-01-27
Packaged: 2019-03-10 00:50:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13493361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enduringreality/pseuds/enduringreality
Summary: Drabbles/Compilation of some Hiro dealing with Tadashi dying moments based on the poem Do Not Stand at my Grave and Weep.





	1. Chapter 1

Based on the poem, 'Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep"written in 1932 by Mary Elizabeth Frye.

.

Hiro visited him as often as he could. Between college and being a part of the team, he had little time to spare, using most of that time for his inventions.

The first time he ever went there, it was fall and the ground was covered in leaves of many colors. His grave sat under a grand old tree, shining in the afternoon light.

The bright orange and red leaves that surrounded his headstone sent Hiro back in a recoil. The leaves, even though they were simply lying there, seemed to reflect the fire in his eyes, the image burned there since that night.

The burning fire,

burning the air,

burning the building,

burning Tadashi.

Burning,

burning,

burning.

Hiro stumbled back, tripping over his own feet and falling to his knees. He closed his eyes, breathing slowly and then opened them, letting the fire burn through the leaves lying dead on the ground.

Hiro moved forward to sit by the headstone, taking a deep breath. He gave a small smile, pulling the hat out from his backpack and holding it tightly in his hands.

"Hey there bro," his voice was scratchy. "How's it going?"

The rain began to fall gently as the boy sat with his brother on the cool autumn day.


	2. Chapter 2

Hiro was up there again with Baymax. It seemed so peaceful. His thoughts drifted with the clouds. From the day at nerd school, to the robber they caught tonight, to Tadashi. The sights up here were just so raw and real. The moon was a fingernail, so small, yet the light it gave off was reflective enough, and oh the stars.

Baymax stated that being up this late could be harmful to his body, but Hiro ignored him. For the time being, the stars were all he needed.

They seemed to protect him from everything he had seen. It had been a year since Tadashi had died. He and the team, they had made such a difference in San Fransokyo and now they were traveling sometimes, helping other cities. Just the other day he had saved a family from a burning building.

A family. How much would his life have changed if that had been his brother he had saved from that house fire? Hiro stared into the night sky, gazing into the mystery of the stars that shone that night.

"Hey Tadashi, can you see this view?"

The wind whistled around them as they sat on the balloons, the air was calm and it seemed if he just kept on staring into the darkness, something would come, someone would appear. Hiro fell back, allowing himself to relax and stare into the stars. There was something so fantastic about them, but he couldn't put his finger on it.


	3. Chapter 3

He woke that morning like every other for the past week. His throat was scratchy and dry, face stiff, and the taste of salt lingered as he licked his lips. Hiro kept his eyes shut, pretending it still to be that time between sleep and wake, that place of thoughts and darkness.

Hiro let his steady breathing quiet for a moment as he listened to the hush of the morning's wake. He opened his eyes to see the sun was just barely rising, sending streams of light pouring in his window.

The boy sat up and wrapped his blanket around his body, then walked over to the window. There were no words to describe the experience of being able to watch the sun rising that morning.

Hiro sat by the window staring out until Aunt Cass called up that it was time for breakfast. He ignored her, suddenly attracted to the three birds that flew in circles around and around in no particular order. They circled in front of his window for a minute before taking off and flying towards the sun rising in the east.

He sat there, staring after them for a while. The birds, they seemed to be watching him more so than he was watching them. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and then walked back to his bed, laying back down to clear his head.


	4. Chapter 4

Hiro had never really seen the snow. The weather in San Fransokyo was moderate, and while it did snow briefly every year or so, there was no time when snow piled up and school was canceled and everyone would rush outside to build a snowman.

The year after Tadashi died, the team had built up a reputation as Big Hero 6. They were the heroes of the century and everyone knew who they were. That was why when an official from up north contacted Hiro and his team if they could come and help their city, they were eager to help.

The team took Fred's family jet to the city, and got there around dinnertime. It was too late to contact the governor who would be taking them to the problem areas, so they settled in the hotel room that was reserved for them. The holiday mood was spent laughing and smiling between all of them, but then the time came to go to sleep.

Hiro deactivated Baymax and then lay in his bed, thinking of the holidays to come and what presents to get his friends and family. His lullaby was the sound of Wasabi muttering in his sleep about Fred screwing up his tools again.

When they woke in the morning, the windows shone with a bright white. Squinting, Hiro stood up and looked out the glass door to where nearly two feet of snow had fallen overnight. He slipped on his shoes quickly and raced out to where the crisp air blew through his hair. He blocked out the sounds of Wasabi shouting about colds and Baymax inflating, saying that it was too cold to go outside without a jacket, and just breathed.

The sun began to peek out of the morning clouds and suddenly this world of white began to glow- no, to radiate diamonds. Every single snowflake sparkled, giving off the appearance that they had somehow absorbed the sun. Hiro could only think to laugh in the awe of it all.

He continued to laugh and laugh, the sorrow of Tadashi not being able to be here for Christmas melting away, and suddenly he was here, laughing with Hiro. Hiro laughed until tears were streaming from his eyes, but this time not from sadness. From memories that suddenly resurfaced and took over all emotions.

His laughter died down and he wiped away the tears with the back of his hand. Tadashi was here, in this snow that sparkled like diamonds, in the air that bit fiercely, but in a way that seemed more clear than it had ever been before. He walked back in the room, feeling not in the slightest cold, and all he could do was smile.


	5. Chapter 5

Hiro saw Tadashi everywhere.

San Fransokyo was a beautiful city. Life was always rushing by. The trolley dinging as it went up and down the road. Cars beeping at one another. The bell at Aunt Cass's cafe ringing as each customer came in and out. Breathing in and out. It was as if the city was alive.

SFIT was the same. Students walking around all the time. Different people with different lives, but the same heartbeat each day. Hiro had gotten used to it.

He hadn't spent more than a summer there with Tadashi, but that was more than enough. He had every corner of Tadashi's office memorized as well as his garage at home. Where the screwdrivers and extra nails were kept, where Tadashi had hidden his energy bars and the extra chocolate in the back of his desk for when Fred decided to come in and watch him work.

There was a reason why Tadashi had gotten his own work room at SFIT, it was because he was the prodigal son. The rising force of SFIT's modern health improvements and the predicted star of the medical field.

When Hiro finally came to SFIT after Callaghan was arrested, he was greeted by the Board of Directors and welcomed with open arms. Hiro smiled as best he could and didn't say anything when they compared him to his brother, and Hamada Tadashi slipped out instead of Hamada Hiro during his classes.

He got used to people coming up and talking to him about his brother's research. How Baymax was helping so many people in hospitals and how Tadashi had inspired others to pursue the research field in medical technology. He couldn't say he didn't understand. Tadashi had done so much for SFIT and within a couple months after Hiro's remodeling of Baymax, the third design had gone out across the country to help hundreds of thousands of people.

But, Tadashi was there. He was in the beeping of the timer and the smell of donuts slightly burnt if he didn't run fast enough to the stove. He was the trolley bell ringing and the crackling announcement that was barely heard as, "next stop 3rd and 5th". He was the smell of leftover pizza in the garage and fresh laundry right out of the dryer. Aunt Cass never understood why he had taken to doing his own laundry out of the blue.

The graveyard was beautiful. There was no question to that. Flowers on stone and neatly trimmed grass. But that wasn't Tadashi. He wasn't the cold marble or the perfume of freshly cut roses. He was a warm hug that smelled of gasoline and left oil stains on your favorite shirt.

Hiro stood up and brushed off his jeans of the strands of grass that clung on with one hand, the other furiously wiping at his cheeks. He knew Tadashi wouldn't want him to cry, but it wasn't a conscious choice.

Hiro let himself smile as he walked out through the gates of the cemetery. From here he could see the sun setting behind the trees in the park. If he ran, he would just be able to make it. The Summer Festival started today and the fireworks went off at dusk.

Aunt Cass would be waiting for him there. And Tadashi- in the warm grass and the plaid blanket they always sat on, the smell of gunpowder and cold popcorn and leftover donuts, Tadashi would be there.

Hiro began to run as a laugh bubbled up in his chest. Yeah, Tadashi would be there. He would always be there.

_Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die._


End file.
